Friut Sticks, Rice Crackers, Banana Bashes
by Wakaremasen
Summary: My first fic, siigh, no excuse, letters of their last summer (after sixth year). MWPP and L. Patchy, please r/r.


Fruit Sticks, Rice Crackers, Banana Bashes.  
By Wakaremasen   
  
  
[*]  
  
Dear Lily  
  
Missing you absolutely terribly, most noted for your famed fruit sticks and banana bashes, my stomach cannot simply cope with the shock! I am here in Trinidad, watching for any sign of entertainment. I have only found one burly, drunk wizard who has a butterbeer gut the size of a small Hippogriff. The time towards my seventeenth birthday is drawing nearer and nearer, I cannot bear with all the suspense and pressure of it all. What subjects are you taking for your N.E.W.T's? I (like you would care, I am only telling you this so you know not to sabotage my books, for I have several spare copies of each and I am preparing endlessly for various pranks as revenge for last year) am taking Care of Magical Creatures, all the usuals, Advanced Arithmancy and, send out the bugles, Trepidation! Yes! You read right Lily dear! I, Sirius Black, am studying the fine art of mischief making, prank pulling and hysteria hooning! Your dearest JAMES POTTER is teaching me, as am I teaching him. We shall set each other various pranks to play on you, dear 'sweet' delicate flower of James's erotic dreams! (James is going to simply kill me!). How are your warm, tropical, British holidays? All faring well? Much to my disgust! How is Jenny? And Teijin? And Erin? And Siobhan? They are all thinking of me, right? James is pining for his one true love, Moony is very pliable these holidays, he is very, very patient, especially with me, which is an awful surprise. He is very logical, a listener he is turning into; you know, the quiet mysterious type that most girls swoon over? Of course, he always was that, but now it is noticeable, even to me, the ignorant bastard (in your opinion) or the handsome, wily, untamable, intelligent prefect (in the Hufflepuffs opinion). Have a safe holiday; do be careful, James's heart would simply break if you were dead. Watch out for Voldemort, he is getting more and more dangerous as we speak (I speak) (I write).  
  
My thoughts, Sirius.  
  
P.S. 'Bella dropped in, she apparated, she is what, twenty-something now right?  
  
P.P.S. I am taking my apparation test in May.  
  
P.P.P.S. James sends his love.  
  
Sirius  
  
[*]  
  
Dear Twit!  
  
I am having a simply splendid time here in wizard London. I am not dead, as you may have figured and all of the girls mentioned haven't even spoken of you, not even a breath! Except Jenny, she speaks about nothing but you. Do you think Sirius would like that song? Should I buy him a present for coming back? Oh, I want that sundae, it is Sirius' favourite, no, I'll get a dog, that's his favourite animal isn't it? It drives me simply insane! I am staying at the Leaky Cauldron if you want to Floo over. Or fly on the superb acquisition that you decided to keep from me, yes, you read right! Remus told me, he is spending some time here too. He had to 'leave'. We saw Serevus Snape the other day, greasy as ever, he was buying some new robes, he'll be back, unless he got his books from somewhere else… Once again, James seems to be eluding me, why can't I just ask him out. Whenever I talk to him, I get all comfortable but then when the right moment waves its bare butt at me my mouth goes all hard and dry and the words simply refuse point blank to come out. James is coming over here Wednesday next week if you want to get your school supplies then. Gee! I'm a wealth of information today!   
  
Not missing you at all-Lily.  
  
[*]  
  
Moony  
  
Do you want to come over on Saturday? Bring the usual, send my owl back with your reply  
  
Prongs.  
  
[*]  
  
Prongs  
  
As you know, Sunday is the full moon, so I am not permitting myself to stay the night unless the moon is rising during the day as it sometimes does. However, I would be delighted to spend a pleasurable day at your manor. I shall Floo over at around nine thirty, so do be awakened!  
  
Remus  
  
[*]  
  
Moony  
  
Fantastic! See you then!  
  
James  
  
[*]  
  
Dear Padfoot  
  
Have you got your school stuff yet? See you at Kings Cross Station September one.  
  
-James-  
  
[*]  
  
Dearest James-  
  
Please meet me at the corner of the bridge on the Thames River at seven O'clock; tonight.  
  
Love Lily  
  
[*]  
  
Lily  
  
Okay, see you then  
  
-James-  
  
[*]  
  
James  
  
See you then  
  
Lily  
  
[*]  
  
[Howler]  
  
SIRIUS BLACK!  
  
YOU SET ME UP, DIDN'T YOU? I AM SIMPLY GOING TO KILL YOU! WAIT UNTIL I SEE YOU ON WHENEVER! YOU ARE GOING TO THE GRAVE!  
  
James  
  
[*]  
  
Sirius;  
  
Thanks, I owe you one!  
  
Lily  
  
[*]  
  
Moony  
  
How have your holidays been? Where are you now? This owls going to take forever to get there, wherever you may be. I wish I picked somewhere like Tahiti now, not Trinidad; Trinidad isn't the remotest bit tropical.   
  
Padfoo'  
  
[*]  
  
Lily;  
  
Yes, you owe me a big one! I got a howler! Off James! It was so embarrassing, the smoke alarm (you know, the muggle tool to detect a fire in the hotel) went off as it exploded and I was almost arrested. I did some memory charms (Flitwick's going to be so pleased) on them to make them forget, but some are still suspicious. Charms are your area right? Is it right if they knew something happened, but they don't know what?  
  
Sirius  
  
[*]  
  
Sirius,  
  
No, it isn't right when that happens. But if you put a stronger one on them, it may permanently injure their memory. Be careful for once in your life.  
  
Lily  
  
[*]  
  
King Sirius!  
  
I DID IT! I DID IT! I DID IT! I DID IT! I DID IT! I DID IT! I DID IT! I DID IT! I DID IT! I DID IT!  
  
Your humble Lily.  
  
[*]  
  
Lily:  
  
About bloody time too! I was wondering when James was going to admit he liked, sorry, cherished you! He has done ever since the first day he met you; you know, when we nicked your Cauldron Cakes? Aaah, they were the days, insouciant, nonchalant and restless; no creditability what so ever, free to escapade and monkeyshine about, not agonising the infinitesimal over our studies. I think you shall help me with my charms homework a few (3) times when I require your assistance! Have fun, you know what I mean!   
  
Sirius; Chief Cupid and Matchmaker of the Marauders.  
  
[*]  
  
Dear Lily  
  
I would like to thank you for a fantastic time on Thursday evening and must urge you to come over to my manor on the first day of the week (Sunday). We shall have lunch, laze about; do anything we please. Maybe we could go and bother someone.  
  
James  
  
[*]  
  
Dear James  
  
Sorry! I can't come; I have a doctor's appointment, a muggle one, so no you can't accompany me! I don't think we could risk that, but I shall drop in to see you.  
  
Love Lily  
  
[*]   
  
Sir Sirius;  
  
Would you be so delighted as to meet me outside the Sunset Bar, Trinidad? I would be quite satisfied if you do not know where it is and are in dire need of assistance. I shall pick you up tonight at five pm sharp in your hotel 'suite'. Dress in the proper attire, do take care.  
  
James  
  
PS. It's in Wizard Trinidad; you do know where that is don't you?  
  
[*]  
  
Prongs  
  
There is a wizarding community here?! How come I didn't know? How come you didn't tell me? Why, oh why am I constantly the last to know?! Oh, I think I am going to faint.  
  
Siriusly wish you were coming earlier; Sirius.  
  
PS How do you know where Wizard Trinidad is?  
  
PPS How come you failed to bring this to my attention?  
  
PPPS Do I wear robes?  
  
PPPPS Owl me back as soon as you possibly can!  
  
PPPPPS Just to annoy you!  
  
PPPPPPS Bye!  
  
[*]  
  
Sirius! Don't do that! You know how it vexations me!  
  
I will be there at five O'clock, wear muggle garments, but bring robes for we will look very strange without them. We will be going into the Sunset Bar, which is supposed to have the best butterbeer in whatever country you are. I shall be flying over, for my apparation test is the same day as yours. -James.  
  
[*]  
  
Lily; I must talk to you, about us. Meet me, erm, Sunday night at nine O'clock (you will be allowed won't you?) inside the tower of Big Ben. If you can't get in without being seen meet me under the clocks, you know, and we'll use the invisibility cloak. James.  
  
[*]  
  
(Ink is smudged from tearstains rolling down the very battered, old piece of forgotten parchment)  
  
Dear Remus.  
  
I do hope this reaches you before you get to James's house tomorrow. I sincerely apologise if this owl wakes you up. I think James is going to break up with me Sunday; we are meeting at the Big Ben clock. I am so worried, what if he does? I love him Remus. Love him. I have forever. I was too caught up in hating him, the image he depicts to others. A portrayal of his mischievous character, which he still has. His big brown eyes, his affection, everything Remus. I don't know what I'll do being Head Girl with him being Head Boy. How will I cope? I don't want to lose him Remus, not after having him. It is impossible to go back. Like Alchemy, it is a chemical reaction, though, they in the magical society, can be reversed. Oh listen to me. Sobbing on about my love life, which is soon to be non-existent. How has your week been? Excellent I trust. Sorry about this letter. My tears have even smudged the ink, I'm sure you'll be able to decipher them. Thanks for reading this. I needed to get it out, so the heaviness disappeared.   
  
Lily  
  
[*]  
  
Dear Lily.   
  
Your letter just caught me as I was pulling my window down. Would James really break up with you? I doubt it, he is so devoted and captivated by you. Last year, the end of it, it dawned on him. He was going to kiss you, but I don't think he knew how you would react (he thought you were going to hex him, blowing him up into bite size pieces then pour gravy over the remains and eat you for the nearest meal). I doubt he would. He probably is itching to tell you he got onto some Quidditch team or he has an idea about what you can do on a date. Whatever. Sorry about the fabulous reply, I'm really tired. My robes are about four sizes too large as well. G'Night.   
  
Remus  
  
[*]  
  
Dear Remus.  
  
Thanks for replying so promptly. I am sorry, but I have recovered. I'm going to reply tonight and send this tomorrow so you don't have to clamber out of bed. I have thought it through and I have decided that I will beat him in every subject, get there earlier, attend every lesson, put my hand up for every question, get everything right (even in sigh, transfiguration) and get a boyfriend is he breaks up with me. I know he is sensitive about that, so I'll do it, the perfect revenge. My eyelids are sagging, I bid you a good, decent sleep for once in a while.   
  
Thanks, Lily.  
  
[*]  
  
Dear James  
  
I'm owling ahead just so you know. Hope this doesn't wake you from slumber you need all the beauty sleep you can get (I sound like Sirius). Lily thinks you are breaking up with her, I don't know why. You have seen the love in hate, overcome your grief and swallowed your pride and asked her out. She seems to think after all that emotional strain that you are going to cut it off. You aren't are you? Because you fit together, like clay. Right, well, erm, whatever. Don't break up with her. For your sake. You are just meant to be. After a year Prongs, a year.   
  
Remus  
  
[*]  
  
Moony  
  
Don't worry, I'm not going to 'cut it off', I need to talk to her. Sorry about worrying her. I didn't think she would take it so blackly. It's good news, but you'll hear it later, I'm sure. Go to sleep, I'll tell the owl to look in and see if you're asleep and wait if you are.  
  
Thanks, Prongs  
  
[*]  
  
James?  
  
Lily?  
  
Sirius?  
  
Remus?  
  
Why aren't any of you writing to me? Have I done something wrong? I'll tell on you if I have!  
  
Write to me, please.  
  
Wormtail  
  
[*]  
  
Shut up Peter  
  
--Sirius  
  
[*]  
  
Wormtail  
  
What? Why would you want me to write to you anyhow? You hate me!  
  
Lily  
  
[*]  
  
Wormtail,  
  
You said you didn't want us to mail you incase you were in France. Why didn't you write to us and say that you weren't in France? It's your fault. See you, -James.  
  
[*]  
  
Sorry Peter. Didn't you not say you were going to France? And didn't you instruct us not to write unless you wrote?   
  
Remus (you woke me up)  
  
[*]  
  
Dear Sirius.   
  
Today we went into Daigon Alley and got some new prank things that I am very sure Snape will appreciate. And Lockheart too. We got some new scented dungbombs, they smell worse, I am writing this out on the pergola for it smells way to severe in my room. Remus has just left, no doubt he will be writing to you to tell you about today. We also got some new slime, it's called frog-spawn slime. It's really icky and gooey. It will look good in Snape's hair. We also collected some fake wands, which we shall ever so thoughtfully provide for the Hufflepuffs, Ravenclaws will spot them immediately for what they really are. We also have some lovely itching powder, which is now invisible. The canister isn't, the powder is, so we can shake it everywhere and it won't be detected. That, of course, is conditional. It shows up in polyjuice potion (which I have brewed a batch of for various reasons) and it shows up when the spell 'revealo' is used. So, we must be very careful. I shall be there in about half an hour (be there by the time this gets to you).   
  
--Prongs.  
  
[*]  
  
Lily  
  
Just a short note.   
  
Bye!  
  
Padfoot  
  
PS Hahaha  
  
PPS Isn't this annoying?  
  
PPPS I'm going to hit the town with Jamsie boy tonight!  
  
PPPPS Have you noticed that the P etc. S's contain more information than the actual letters themselves?  
  
PPPPPS James is not going to break up with you!  
  
PPPPPPS How did I know that?  
  
PPPPPPPS Really, how did I know that?!  
  
PPPPPPPPS Aww, shucks! Should I tell you?  
  
PPPPPPPPPS Hmm…  
  
PPPPPPPPPPS Nah!  
  
PPPPPPPPPPPPS Is this annoying?  
  
PPPPPPPPPPPPPPS Bye now!  
  
Sirius  
  
[*]  
  
Sirius! You twit! You know how much I loathe them!  
  
How do you know that James wasn't going to break up with me? How was your time in Wizard Trinidad? Do you know how to get there now? I should have told you. I had to get there once for an order for Dervish and Banges. You know, I used to work there before Helga said I was harassing her and jinxing her. That was the other way around. I was fired, but so was Helga. I don't have a tarnished reputation at least. I am going to Knockturn Alley if you need anything from there. Helena and Jenny say hi. Siobhan says: you are a sleaze Sirius! Mary says: What's a sleaze? Raqueala says oh no.   
  
Lily-heh!  
  
[*]  
  
Lily  
  
(Burp) I am soo drunk. My head is spinning! We had these yummy rum things so I'll answer your questions when I am more sober. Man! I have the worst hangover. My head is too heavy for my neck! James managed to stay fairly sober (he was driving the broomstick) and I threw up at least six times last night. Ooh, yuck! (I just threw up, it's purple) and we had butterbeer cocktails. Ooh, and whisky floaters. We had dinner too, I can't quite remember what it was and anyhow it isn't in my digestive system now. And rice crackers, the muggle ones. I am addicted to the chicken ones and have a whole supply in my room right now. I am not eating them for fear of losing them. What a lose that would be.  
  
Hiccup, Sirius.   
  
[*]  
  
Sirius, how drunk did you get? I have a few flecks of purple vomit on the parchment, so thoughtfully provided by you. I had to throw the letter out. It smells disgusting! I can't write anymore because I'm about to go and meet James. Lily  
  
[*]  
  
Remus!  
  
Why don't you mail me?!  
  
Oh, that's right, sorry friend, I forgot.  
  
Wormtail  
  
[*]  
  
Remus, Sirius.  
  
You were both right. James didn't break up with me. James will fill you in on all the details on the Hogwarts Express I dare say. Final year at Hogwarts, isn't it scary? And Voldemort (do you say it without the 't' on the end like Voldemor or Voldemort?) is getting stronger too!  
  
Thanks for your help Remus (and Sirius?) -Lily.  
  
[*]  
  
Everyone-Be in the usual compartment if any one of us is late. -James.  
  
[*]  
  
Yeah, we'll meet before then anyway, what if it is taken?  
  
Sirius  
  
[*]  
  
Well then we go to the very back of the train like we usually do. Sorry, I forgot me Sirius, Remus and Lily will. Prefects compartments. Sorry Peter. Prongs  
  
[*]  
  
FINE! Peter.  
  
[*]  
  
See you all tomorrow!  
  
Good Luck! Lily  
  
[***]  
  
Okay, I know this is wierd, and the title doesn't fit (I was really hungry when I wrote this) but it is my first fic, attempt and I shall revoke it immediately if I get bad reviews. Please review this. Siigh.  
  
Wakaremasen*** 


End file.
